November 8, 2009
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She’s Dying To Talk To Someone
One of the people on my Friends List, Nancybratt, has long suffered from an eating disorder. She appears to be near the end of her struggles. She updated today for the first time in a while. Reading her entries will give you some further insight into why I believe sites of those with eating disorders should not be banned. I can totally relate to her need to communicate with others about her condition, and its effects. Even though I have no plans on dying soon, I have told my wife that if I should die, I would want someone to let my Xanga friends know. For Nancy, this is her way of saying goodbye to her Xanga friends, and whoever else cares about her, or anyone suffering from an ED. Perhaps through sharing this, she can help raise awareness, allowing someone else to get help, or at least open up to someone they love, before they reach this point. In the last post I saw from her, she said she looked forward to being finally able to rest. I looked at her profile tonight, and this is an excerpt from her profile:
About Me: Hospice entered our lives in September. Nannys body will succumb to “multisystem failure” after a tough 4 year battle. We are learning to face the ramifications of years of ED abuse on her tired body. We am here for anyone who needs to talk. We are near the end of her battle, but will do all we can to help. god bless Mama k, Nanny and Jenny
Peices of Me | Nancybratt on Xanga
Please keep Nancy in your thoughts and, if you are religious (what faith you follow matters not at all) pray for her. Finally, if you think someone you love needs help, please talk to them.
Comments (38)
Oh God. That is the saddest thing I have ever read in my life. I am still crying. My heart hurts for her.
@crazy2love - Mine, too.
Oh, wow. Thank you for posting this.
Thanks for posting. And I’m praying too.
:-
This totally made me an emotional wreck. I feel so fortunate that my ED never got that out of control. And all of that hospice business…my aunt recently died of cancer.
All so overwhelming.
It’s good her story is out there. People need to hear it and see it.
All my thoughts and love go out to her and her family.
Wow.
That is so very sad. What an incredible senseless waste…. sigh….
I am crying. She’s such a brave women who has impacted many other lives! I will be in prayer for her and for those who love her. Thank you for alerting us to her final days. And you are SO right about helping those we love…helping them NOW! Hugs to you, My Friend!
I’m speechless right now. It is amazing the level of serenity that shines through her words, depsite the fact that she’s nearing the end. Thank you for sharing this. It reminded me how precious life is, and how easily I forget. I will keep Nancy in my prayers.
Words fail to define these thoughts and emotions.
Sweet dreams Nancy.
I have been following her blog too, for a few months now. My heart aches for her. EDs continue to steal so many sweet, wonderful people like Nancy.
i think.. i just felt my heart break into two.
This is… heartbtreaking. I’ll pray for her.
Praying~ and thank you for helping bring awareness~ and not letting her struggle be in vain.
Wow! That is so sad. I will keep her and her family in my prayers.
My Prayers go out to her, her family and to all the lives that she touched. May peace and love by in all the hearts that are effected by her.
-God please bless her, her family and friends. May they be able to gather the strength from each other and make it through this hard time with love in their hearts and the courage to face the world with a new open eye. To cherish the moments they do get to have and the ones they already have shared together. May she not be forgotten for she was loved by all that got to know her. Amen
Will do.
:[ Sad.
oh wow.
wow.. why would anyone want to ban that? So strange.
That’s really sad.
thanks for posting. i will pray for her.
Wow that is so sad.
Too sad. She’s in my thoughts & prayers.
I find it hard to think of any one who should be banned from Xanga, especially NancyBratt.
wow. my prayers go out to her…and her family.
thank you for posting this.
@Eternalimplosion - The follow-up post is about to go up; it includes a video she made, telling her story and sending out her love to Xanga!
@lonelywanderer2 - wow, thanks for keeping us apprised!
I cannot stop crying. This makes my heart hurt so.
I’m speechless…such a sad story.
I have had an eating disorder for almost 3 years now. This is really sad and I just wish I could reach out to this girl. God bless her.
What a sad and touching story.
My hearts go out to her and her loved ones.
just a shade now palely loitering…sweet smile as she drifts off this mortal coil
oxox
Regarding the banning of eating disorder sites, no one is trying to ban websites about those with eating disorders, what people are trying to have banned are PRO-ANA websites, and I am also one of the people who believe these sites should be banned.
There is a huge difference between pro-ana websites and websites dealing with those who have eating disorders.
People who are pro-ana don’t have eating disorders, although they emulate some of the symptoms of eating disorders for attention. Pro-anas make websites to share tips on how to starve yourself or how to make yourself vomit. They share extremely dangerous and deadly tips that have caused serious, irreversible damage to anyone who uses them, and have also killed many people. Not only do they share these horrible tips, they also post something called “thinspiration.”
Thinspiration is photos of people who are very sick, sometimes dying, most often photos of people with anorexia nervosa. The pro-anas use these photos on their sites to motivate others to lose weight by emulating the behaviors of people with eating disorders. The pro-anas do not ask permission to use these photos, they steal them from people who would never want their photos used this way.
I have had my photos stolen by those rotten pro-anas, and some are still stealing and posting my photos. It is very damaging to the people who are in the photos that they steal.
Years ago, this horrible man abducted me and forced me to pose in horrible, disgusting photos, her also raped and abused me many times. I was not the only woman he did this to, either. He had a fetish for women with anorexia nervosa, and he would abduct them, force them to pose in sick photos and then rape them. Eventually, thank goodness, I was able to get away from him, as was another girl he was holding as well (we met during captivity and became close, consoling each other after horrible things happened to us.) Sadly, my friend passed away shortly after we escaped, due to her anorexia.
Some time after this happened, I was on the internet one day and came across those horrible photos he had taken of us. I was horrified and so disgusted. He posted them on an anorexic fetish porn website. Words can’t describe how hurt I was by this.
I did everything I could to have that horrible site shut down and the photos gone forever. Thankfully, I was able to get the site shut down, but it was too late.
Some time before the site was closed, some pro-ana person had found the site, and the photos of my friend and I, and took them. They then reposted the photos on a pro-ana website to use as thinspiration. From here, more pro-anas took them and did the same and the photos spread like wild fire. There had been a time, a few years back when you could not find a single pro-ana website that didn’t have at least one or two of my photos on it. I was completely devastated. I had many suicide attempts over all of this, and landed myself in various hospitals. I was so damaged by what those horrible pro-anas were doing to me, and to my deceased friend. They dragged our names through the mud, and ruined us. They brought back all the memories of the horrible abuse and torture we went through, causing me to go through countless flashbacks, and causing my anorexia to become worse. It was just horrible, and they didn’t give two shits at all, they only care about themselves. I have never met anyone more selfish and conceited than a pro-ana.
The terrible thing about those pro-anas, is that they go around making websites about eating disorders, glamorizing eating disorders and promoting them as lifestyle choices instead of illnesses, yet over 95% of pro-anas do not, and have never had an eating disorder in their entire life. They have no idea what having an eating disorder is like, yet they feel they have a right to glamorize a deadly illness that they couldn’t possibly understand!
It’s just completely beyond me, how someone could be that selfish and that stupid. We are talking about ILLNESSES, and deadly ones at that. Illnesses that someone doesn’t chose to contract, or want to have. Those of us with genuine eating disorder never wanted to be this way, we didn’t wake up one morning and just decide “Oh, today I’m going to have anorexia nervosa! Yay…”
These pro-anas just don’t have a bloody clue what they are talking about, and one of the worst things, in my opinion, is that people actually BELIEVE them, and believe that they actually have eating disorders, when the most certainly do not. The only thing a pro-ana suffers from, in most cases, is Münchausen’s syndrome and/or factitious disorder. These people feign mental illnesses for attention.
Because of those idiots posting photos of me all over their horrible websites, I have actually been blamed for being one of them, or for supporting their terrible websites. I am so angry that someone could have the audacity to call me pro-ana, when anorexia nervosa has left me terminally ill, living out my final days in a hospice.
I have been diagnosed with anorexia nervosa for roughly 25 years (I was anorexic years prior to being diagnosed, but I don’t count those years.) and due to my anorexia nervosa, I am dying from multiple organ failure (multi-system failure). I also suffer from a ridiculous amount of other health issues as well, all because of my eating disorder. There is no way in hell that I would EVER promote or glamorize this horrible, deadly illness. (Actually, I speak out online about eating disorders to educate people about them, about the dangers of them, I also speak out against the pro-anas online as well as try to dispel the myths, stereotypes and misinformation surrounding eating disorders. I also share my story online, in hopes that it will be able to convince those with eating disorders to seek help before they end up like me, and to show people the damage eating disorders can do.)
Anyways, I just wanted to let you know the difference, and that no one is trying to ban websites about people who actually have eating disorders. Nancybratt’s website is not a pro-ana website, so there is no worry over her site being banned or anyone else who isn’t pro-ana. The only websites people are trying to ban are the pro-ana websites, and I most certainly agree, they should be banned as soon as possible and anyone creating those websites should be held fully responsible for their despicable actions. Jail time sounds quite appropriate to me, for someone who is assisting in the suicides of thousands. (Not to mention all the lies, incorrect medical information given out on their sites, the irreversible bodily damage done to thousands of people, the emotional damage done to all the people in the photos they steal, and just all of the terrible damage they cause people.)
I hope that I’ve been able to clear things up for you!
~BonyPink a.k.a. TheStrawberryNinja
My goodness, Xanga crunched my message all up. I originally had spaces between all my paragraphs, but they removed them when I posted this. Darn!!!
@X_naomi_X -
@vexations -
I am not sure if it’s of interest, however I just explained what the whole ordeal is about, regarding the banning of various websites you commented about. (You can read my explanation in the comment above this one. The big, long one, haha!)
@TheStrawberryNinja - Thanks for reading, and for your input. I am sorry to hear of all you have suffered, but glad you came through it. I wish you only well.