June 26, 2013
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When I Tell You I care About You
I occasionally let my Xanga friends know that I love them, and care about them, whether or not I personally know them. I have been told a couple of times that my expressions of love are “random”, and I guess sometimes they are. This is sometimes met with skepticism, or even hostility. “How could you love so many people, especially if you don’t even know them?”
The answer is that I am open to getting to know my Xanga friends as well as they want. I actually don’t differentiate between internet friends and friends “In Real Life, or IRL” I consider you all my friends. When I see a person is particularly depressed or hurting, or in need of a friend that cares, I let them know I am open to listening, and that I honestly do care that they are hurting, and want them to feel better.
People blog about their pain, and I read that, and want them to know I do care. Once I have started to care about you, I can’t turn that off, even if you don’t believe I care, or for whatever reason, my caring makes you uncomfortable.
You are a person, and as such, you deserve to be loved, and to know somebody cares.
Comments (57)
this is exactly how i feel <3
Wonderful.
awwwwww!! you have a big heart and there is nothing wrong with that!
well said. keep it up
Fully agree.
I am always there for my Xangan friends if they need me, as I am with my real friends.
xo’
yep. me too.
this very kind and sweet of you sweetie!
A lot of people play blogging games here – fake sites, experiements with traffic generation, etc. – and that’s not for me. But there are those that blog about their real worlds and I have REAL friendships with them even though I’ve never met them.
@ItsWhatEyeKnow - So true!
That’s great, and I feel the same way about the few people I’ve gotten to know a little here. I have offered a sympathetic ear to strangers here from time to time; I figure sometimes people just need someone to listen. I feel like I have to be careful who I talk to, though, when I’m down. There are a lot of game players here. I used to be less anonymous but it proved to be a bad idea for me so while it seems I’m “hiding” behind a nameless faceless blog the fact is I only had to get burned once to go behind this wall, so it makes it a little harder to form connections now.
That’s how I feel about my readers
I try to at least read and comment on their blogs and post regularly so I can build familiarity with my readers. Who knows? One may even find love on Xanga! Teehee.
<3
Wonderfully-said. Thank you for sharing your thoughts about this very subject with us.
this is so sweet and amazing <3
Awe, I know what you mean. I pretty much care about everyone, and wouldn’t want anyone to be in real pain. I know how it is and when I see my real life friends, or xanga friends, hurting it hurts me too. I always like to let people know I care about them, it’s good! Keep doing what you do. :]
=]
This is a nice post and this is how I feel. I love my Xanga friends and care about them, even if I don’t know them personally.
And love is not limited. You can love as many people as you want and there will still be more love when it is needed.
Thanks, you are a great person on the internet. By the same token, I assume that you are a nice person in real life.
If it’s positive then I am on board. Negativity hurts the brain!
Lovely.
It’s not that I differentiate between Xanga and real life, or that I wouldn’t believe that someone could love so many people – it’s definitely not that. It’s just that the way you present it . . . you come to my page maybe once every few months, and comment the same thing (that you “care”) – but there’s nothing further than that. It just ends up looking like words to me. Other people have said the same thing to me, but at least they’ve taken the initiative to get to know me whereas I just feel spammed by you. And I can’t call that person a friend, I just can’t. And it’s nothing to do with you personally, not at all; if it were anyone else doing the same thing – again, I can’t call them a friend to me~ I’m sorry!
<3
@ultravioletskies08 - people can care from a distance. Hard lesson to learn. I used to think the same. My brother in Alaska doesn’t call very much but I know not a day goes by he doesn’t think about me. I have friends I haven’t seen since highschool (5 years ago) we email back in fourth once in awhile. But if I needed them, if I really needed them they’d come be with me. It’s about trusting that people don’t have to be in some network of faithful friends of yours to care. A stranger on the street can care and you may not know it. After a really hard day a young girl in Panera stopped me to ask me if I was okay. She cared. There’s people I pass by and care about. A mentally ill man who wonders around in town who urinates all over himself and can’t talk in full sentences. I care about him. I think about him everytime I pass by certain places that remind me of him. I feel helpless because he refuses services and everyone laughs at him. It’s about believing that good people still exist in this world, even if you’ve been proven otherwise. You just have to look for them. And everytime you find a rotten egg move on.
@FallingSafely - I get that people can care from a distance. But he’s putting his foot in the door every.single.time. he comments. I would believe a random person who came upon my page commented once (with the exact message), and never came back again over lonelywanderer. Hearing the same words over and over again in that generic tone for an extended amount of time doesn’t feel genuine – fix the record if you want to hear the music is all I am saying. Otherwise, go find another record to play.
@ultravioletskies08 - I’ve offered to get to know you better, but you don’t believe me. It’s okay; I understand. I won’t “spam” you again. I want to do something positive, not something intrusive. Be well. You deserve it.
I feel the same way. I’ve watched you care about people and help people on here. And when I’ve been down you’ve left encouraging comments. Thank you for that. And thank you for trying to help people here. HUGS!
@adamswomanlost - HUGS back, my friend! You are a wonderful person!
thank you for being a source of inspiration and love to everyone here in xanga.continue on what you are doing, you’ll never know you can change one life.
peace and love.
@SmileCiege - Thank you; back at you!
@FallingSafely - HUGS; you actually get me!
@lonelywanderer2 - I do believe you used to offer before, but that’s the thing –I feel like the same approach you used for someone may not work for someone else, I don’t really know? Anyway, the consensus seems to be that what you do is genuine and appreciated –so, please just ignore me and anything hurtful that I’ve said! Take care~
@ultravioletskies08 - You, too! HUGS
we need more people like you
That’s how I feel about people – I don’t like them suffering, but I also have a ridiculously hard time being affectionate in real life so I definitely don’t do that here. I guess by leaving comments I show people I care. My latest blog entry is about how awkward I am with affection, what an opportune time for me to read this. Hahah.
This was wonderful! <3 I often feel the same way! In a way, my friends on xanga know way more about me than my friends in real life, because I’m honest here in a way that real life doesn’t allow. So though I may not know what they look like or what their real name is, we’re sharing who we really are, which is much deeper.
this is really sweet and so nice of you. and yeah, I don’t like the distinction between real friends and internet friends either, what difference does it make. you care so you care, not matter if you have seen the person and talked to him like face to face or not. really sweet of you.
This tells me that you are a caring person. But it doesn’t exactly tell me how you treat people when you’re in the same room with them.
This is amazing, i know the feeling, you’re an amazing person to be so caring about people on xanga despite not knowing them personally, there is no difference, a person is a person online or off nice entry <3
It’s always good to know there are real people on Xanga – our sharing of joys and hurts, caring and love is what makes us human and not just an electronic persona. I trust very few, but it’s crystal clear who’s genuine…and you’re one of them.
I feel the same way. Great post.
aww you’re amazing !!
I feel the same way. Spread the LOVE!!
Thanks for being a friend
I care about you too.
You’re are one of the sweetest persons out there. You show affection to those you don’t know, take a bigger heart than many people share even when they though they found true love. Thank you!
I’m a person?
In all seriousness, I think what you’re doing is great. Some of my Xanga friends I’m closer to than some of my meatspace friends.
Everyone does need love and care every once in a while! =)
This just shows how amazing you are.
@adamswomanlost - and you are an amazing person as well
So very true. Many people never think that they are worthy of a strangers care, or concern, even more don’t think they are worthy of it from the ones they know and that DO or should care. It is unfortunate, but its true.
It is great to see this, and to hear that there are people out there that are this open, and willing to simply care, without reservation or with expectation to get something back. I smile and say hello to passerby on the street, it gets me funny looks, and it gets me smiles. That is not the important thing to me. They get to see that someone that has nothing to lose or gain simply took a moment out of their day to acknowledge them. To notice they live and ARE. This, and this alone makes me do it. I will never stop.
I have to add that as an added bonus to my doing this I DO get something out of it. Though nono of them know, nor give it. It has nothing to do with the people I speak to, wave at, or smile at with my goofy grin, or smart alleck smirk. That bonus comes from my love, the one that makes my life so amazing that I have the extra energy and love to share so freely. It comes from the woman that holds my heart and takes good care of it. She rewards me, with smiles, and kisses, and with such amazing things as simple comments about the fact that I do these things for strangers, and that I do, makes her smile. She tells me I am wonderful and amazing for this, and it is such a simple thing to me, yet to her it seems almost as important as the sun. Thank you my love. Thank you for making who I am seem like such a better person, and a good thing, even though I feel that I may not be so great, I can always fall back on this thought and smile.
So, to you, LonelyWanderer, I say congrats, and keep up the good work. Make the masses smile and know they aren’t alone, and you my friend, you will never be alone either. You are an amazing person, you must be, if what I am told is correct. You take the time from your life, to make anothers better, if you can, if not at least a little less crappy if only for a moment. For that I respect and I salute you.
Yours,
Blissful Reader
@BlissfulReader - Thank you. It is good to have you as a friend, also.
I’d rather have 5 Xanga friends who care, then 50 who don’t. Thanks for everything!
Reinforcement slathered on thickly gives me a nice, warm,fuzzy feeling. It is not why I write my blog. It would be better if my visitors disagreed with my point of view — in a civilized way — or clarified the topic, or ignored me.
I don’t make any difference either within my real life friends and my xanga friends. Some people here I’ve come to love so much and they’re such a huge part of my life. I sometimes get the skeptical looks towards my love for them too, I don’t think it’s so hard to get but sometimes people don’t get how much you can actually love
This makes me smile. And I agree with you!
@thegirlwiththecamera - I agree. @we_deny_everything - I feel the same way.@xXxlovelylollipop - That is so strange to me that people don’t get that! @Megabyyte - Thank you. Glad I made you smile!!
You are a very kind, compassionate and wonderful person! Thank you for being a friendly and beautiful soul!
Thank you for caring.